Monday of the First Week of Advent
I have never truly known what Advent was about until this year. I knew it was about waiting, but until now, I did not have a sense of how tremendous the weight of waiting was! Waiting for Jesus in faith and in hope, but also in anxiety and longing.
In January 2019, I will marry the woman of my dreams. This is an exhilarating feeling, but also a frightening one. Like the centurion in today’s reading, I long for Jesus, but know I am not worthy; so the wait is filled with joy but also with fear. I also wait and long for my bride-to-be, even as I am faced with the terror of my own inadequacies. The centurion recognized his deficiencies, but did not let these hamper him from seeking the Lord. He had faith.
This is my challenge this Advent season: to have faith even amid the long wait and the uncertainty and doubts about my own adequacy. St. Francis Xavier is an excellent model of this. Though he did not know the languages or cultures of Japan or India, he nonetheless trusted God’s call to venture forth into the unknown. He knew he would never be up to the task alone, but he had faith in what God could do for him. Like the centurion, who controlled many men, the ambitious young Francis gave up his dreams of wealth and handed his life and trust entirely over to God. So too with my marriage. I know God has great things planned for me, but I also know that without Him, I will never come close to reaching that greatness. To use the cliché, I need to “let go and let God.” May this Advent season be a time for all of us to grow in hope and faith as we wait and long for God and the newness and adventure that comes from life in Him.
Student, School of Law