We’re not being edgy when we make racist, homophobic, ableist, sexist, or body-shaming jokes. When it comes to hate language, impact trumps intent. Words rooted in hate or "humor" hurt. We are responsible for the way our words affect other people, even if we "didn’t mean it like that." We can’t un-ring that bell.

Things are silly, frustrating, unfair, annoying, or uncomfortable—NOT retarded, NOT gay, and NOT lame. Slut is not synonymous with woman, and woman is not an insult. Racial slurs perpetuate historical trauma. Our separation from someone’s situation does not give us license to ignore the effect of verbal violence. Impact trumps intent.

The sexual path one chooses is never a walk of shame. "Slut-shaming" promotes sexual double-standards that label women sluts and men studs. And, "Make me a sandwich?" This might be the most unoriginal, gender-stereotyping "joke" around. It therefore begs the question, "Are you incapable of putting the fixings on two pieces of bread?"

Be careful about assumptions directed toward people of color. “You speak English well” and “Where are you from? No, where are you really from?" are not polite conversation, but micro-aggressions.  Impact trumps intent.

"I’ll pray for you." Although this offering may be well-intended, it can also serve to imply deviance of the prayer’s subject and moral superiority of the person praying. So when a friend trusts us enough to come out with his or her sexual orientation, we must think twice before saying those four words.

Don’t fall to the bystander effect. As we ride the inter-campus shuttle or chat with our friends in The View, odds are there’s someone in earshot who is a survivor of violence. So when a friend or a stranger makes that rape joke, speaking up makes you someone’s hero. Silence favors the oppressor.

Goodbye to ever thinking anyone was “asking for it.”

She is a woman, not a body. She is not a conquest for the bro culture. She has agency. Consent is a sober, verbal, continuous, and enthusiastic “yes.”

She is a woman, not a body. When she chooses to use the AARC’s facilities, ogling threatens her right to feel safe and secure. Feeling like prey should not be the opportunity cost of maintaining her fitness.

She is a woman, not a body. Her choice to wear a V-neck or yoga pants is not an invitation for sexual commentary and advances.

She is a woman, not a body. She is not a conquest for the bro culture. She has agency. Consent is a sober, verbal, continuous, and enthusiastic “yes.”

She is a woman, not a body. When she chooses to use the AARC’s facilities, ogling threatens her right to feel safe and secure. Feeling like prey should not be the opportunity cost of maintaining her fitness.

She is a woman, not a body. Her choice to wear a V-neck or yoga pants is not an invitation for sexual commentary and advances.

Whether or not you wear a North Face jacket or hijab or snapback or flannel or Ugg boots is your choice and doesn’t determine your character. Similarly, having tattoos, makeup, piercings, or colored hair does not imply incompetence. Community-building opportunities should not be lost or won solely based on appearance.

The body you are given is beautiful! The body ideal is a media myth. The texture of your hair, the pigment of your skin, the size or shape of your body is not a basis for shame or self-absorption. Our natural physical differences should not be a divisive force.

We often lose ourselves in our obligations. Take a few minutes for yourself—practice yoga or meditation, throw a ball around, or do whatever brings you personal peace.

And when those things aren’t enough, no one should feel ashamed in seeking someone to talk to. You’d go to a doctor if your shoulder hurts, so why not see a therapist when your heart or mind needs support? We have free Counseling and Psychological Services on campus. Don’t be afraid to use them.

Engage yourself! Let’s be more than bodies occupying desks. St. Thomas is not a place to pursue a “Mrs.” degree or just fulfill our parents’ wishes, but a space for shared learning through our liberal arts foundation. And education doesn’t end when we leave the classroom. Don’t be afraid to have tough conversations; don’t be afraid to question norms. Open yourself to the diversity found within the St. Thomas community through classroom experiences, campus events and activities, and personal encounters. We are all students and we are all teachers. When we engage in constructive dialogue, we create a better world together.

Hello to acknowledging and questioning the quick assumptions we make about each other every day. Hello to recognizing the inherent dignity of every person. Hello to fulfilling our mission statement—our shared goals—to “think critically, act wisely and work skillfully to advance the common good.”